please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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