I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
