She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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