You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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