I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
literally had 100 drinks last night.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Randomize