At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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