Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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