We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
