at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
