I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
