filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize