Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize