yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
