WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
