when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
