I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Randomize
