why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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