I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
