No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
