It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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