On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
My underwear smells like fireworks.
We got so high we made milksteak
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
