for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize