That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
You don't make any sense
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