if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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