I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
