Kiss
Puke
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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