Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
But break dance skills will only take you so far
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
