someone owes me an orgasm
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
