there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
You had me at "let me see your balls"
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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