So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize