Me. At least after what I've been through.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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