Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Having a random hookup so left but love u
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Randomize
