He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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