I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize