i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Randomize
