A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
