Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
