i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
