Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
