You really coming over, don't trick.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Randomize
