I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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