Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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