But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
