This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize