Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
