Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize