I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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