Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry protectnpeeps hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(205): View more from Alabama

Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail

Fav 8 1379 1858
share tweet
(805): View more from California

found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.

Fav 24 6539 899
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(508): View more from Massachusetts

Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower

Fav 21 9773 934
share tweet
(402): View more from Nebraska

yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic

(1-402): View more from Nebraska

i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.

Fav 71 8428 2042
share tweet
(805): View more from California

Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke

Fav 35 1300 8289
share tweet
(512): View more from Texas

I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.

Fav 3 2493 1109
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(580): View more from Oklahoma

I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar

Fav 6 1230 2303
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(316): View more from Kansas

Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday

Fav 2 793 555
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(559): View more from California

I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.

(925): View more from California

Huzzah!

Fav 1 66 9
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT