Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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