are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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